Is Impulsive Behavior Really A Bad Thing?

Lately, I've been struggling severely with something that a lot of borderline folks deal with in one way or another- impulsive behavior. Ever since my diagnosis I have been doing a lot of reading about my disorder, and have been trying to recall instances in which it affected my life. That's when I realized... most of my life is built around the consequences of my impulses for self-sabotage and short-term solutions to my problems. This is not to say that my life is necessarily a bad one. I've got a roof over my head, a fairly steady source of employment, food, two cats whom I love with all of my heart, all of the things necessary to be content in life. I certainly could have made it easier for myself along the way, though, and I'm definitely nowhere near where I want to be in life.

I've made a lot of impulsive decisions in my past, though, and to this day I'm still making them. The thing is, while most things that I've read say that impulsive decision making is a TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, NO GOOD, VERY BAD THING, I'm not quite convinced that broad-spectrum analysis is true. If it weren't for some of my more impulsive moments, I would have never met quite a few of my friends. I wouldn't have slept with people who I later entered into relationships with, would never have learned valuable lessons about the nature of love and friendship from any of these people. Not to say that impulses don't lead to awful things on occasion, but sometimes if you emerge stronger for the experience, it's ultimately worthwhile. 

My current foray into giving into impulse is currently helping me, it's improving my mindset, knowing that people who aren't the ex boyfriend I live with can be attracted to me. (more about him later, he doesn't want me blogging about him so I need to come up with a suitable name to use for him on here.). I've been doing some harmless flirting with a former fling of mine, who knows where it could lead? I'm just happy it's building my confidence up a bit. 

 I've got another male friend who is... interested in me... but I respect his friendship too much to start anything that could ruin the bonds we've built over the past while we've known each other. I've learned the hard way that starting things with people you really care about can lead to trouble, especially with my attachment issues and insecurities, and recognize fully that maybe I'm not emotionally stable enough at this moment in time to have a real relationship. So, a fling in the meantime might not be the worst idea in the world. 

Unfortunately, this fling comes with some slight complications, like small towns and overlapping circles of friends. Neither I nor the other party involved wants certain people knowing about anything that goes on between us, and this may be a challenge. 

All I'm saying, and I guess the main point of this blog post, is that sometimes our impulses can lead to good things, adventures, as long as you try to utilize a small amount of common sense alongside them. 

Love and light, bitches. 

XOXO